But are you happy?

Recently, an old friend and I have gotten in touch.  While we were talking about how our lives have been since we’ve last talked, which was when I was 15 and he was only 14 he asked me a simple question. “But are you happy?” 

This really made me think, lately I have been so wrapped up in all the things I dislike about my life that I have honestly been making myself absolutely miserable.  Things like being behind on a couple bills, and the clutter in my house, silly little things that can be fixed.  Sometimes its things I can’t fix, such as being stuck in the house most of the time.  Without a car, and weather not permitting we don’t really go anywhere.  Seeing the same four walls everyday gets old.  I don’t really have any friends, I don’t know if that was a part of having a baby, or being out in the middle of nowhere.  

These things do kind of suck, but am I happy?  Of course I am!  I have a smart, beautiful daughter who I am lucky enough to stay home with.  I get to be there for every new accomplishment she has, every smile and kiss. I get to take care of her every day, with no worries about someone not doing something right with her.  I have a wonderful boyfriend, who I still get excited to see when he comes home from work.  Someone who I can talk to and enjoy spending time with.  I have a sister who always knows how to cheer me up when I’m down and loves to play with bug.  I have a mom who I am lucky to see every day, the same person who has been my best friend all through life.  

Yes, I am very happy with my life.  Thank you for reminding me. 

Controversial Parenting Tag

1. Pro-life Vs. Pro-choice

I believe that every woman should have a right to dicide what is best for her body.  Now, before I get told that I am an awful person for this, hear me out.  I personally think that abortion should be a last result, because there are other options.  I don’t think it should be used as a form of birth control, because again, there are other options.  But what someone else chooses to do with their body and their pregnancy is all in all, none of my business.

 2. Baby Wearing

I love baby wearing.  Ellie and I do it on occasion, and I wish we had done it more.  When she was little I couldn’t find a sling or carrier that I found comfortable, once I did find one that I love, she was much more independent and most of the time just wanted to get down and play.  I do hope to baby wear a lot more with any future children I have.

3. Circumcision
This is why I am glad I had a girl the first time around.  Personally, I would not get my son circumcised.  From the research I did about this topic before I found out I was having a girl I don’t see any reasons why it needs to be done and I don’t think I could handle hurting my son like that because I hate watching Ellie get needles.  Anthony is uncut, and is quite happy with that, and also doesn’t want his sons to have it done.  At the same time, if someone decides to circumcise their son, I don’t care.  To each their own.

4. Adoption
I don’t have a lot of people in my life that have experience with adoption, but I know that it can be such a beautiful, yet heart wrenching journey to adopt. It’s one of the most selfless acts any parent can take part in for their child.

5. Baby Piercing

I don’t have a problem if parent’s choose to pierce their children, I have personally debated with this time and time again.  I would like to get Eleanor’s ears pierced when she is young, but I think I would like her to be a bit older.   Maybe around two years old.  I had mine done when I was a toddler and we never had any issues with them, but all of my sisters were made to wait until they were 10 (ish) and each one of them got infections really badly, one of them even had their ear close up and grow around the earring.

6. Breast Milk Vs. Formula

I personally breast feed, and will breast feed my future children as well if possible.  Studdies show breast is best, but if someone cannot or will not breast feed it is their choice.  No judgement here.

7. Spanking

This is hard one for me, thankfully I haven’t had to decide to use it or not yet.  I was spanked as a child, and I know it worked for my mom.  I would rather not spank, I think I’d prefer to talk about it, use time outs and every other form of discipline punishment before resorting to spanking.   Right now Ellie is too young to understand time outs, or spanking anyway.

8. Co-sleeping
I think co-sleeping is wonderful, I personally have done it since Eleanor was born.  In the younger months it is so much easier and much more convenient.  But now that she is a year old we are having trouble getting her to sleep on her own in the crib.  Because of that I’m not sure if I will co-sleep again with the next child or not.   Every family has to do what works for them.

9. Home Vs. Public Vs. Private Vs. Charter Schooling 

I would love to be able to home school my children, but I just don’t see it working out.  I have no experience with private or charter schooling so I don’t really have an opinion on them.  Public school was okay, and I figure that’ll be what my children go to as well.

10. Vaccinations

we vaccinate, but each and every parent has to make the decision that best fits their family. I will leave it at that

11. Medicating Children

I really have no experience with this subject.   I think medication should be available for children, in some cases I hear that medication really makes a huge positive difference, and others I hear very negative things about it.   As I said though, it should be an option.

12. Cloth Vs. Disposable diapers 

I tried cloth diapers for a few days and personally just couldn’t get into the groove of it.  Maybe it was because I am so used to disposiables that I really have no idea what to do with cloth.  They say that it is a very easy process, and I’m sure it is once you get the hang of it but I gave up quite quickly on that.   I love the idea of it though.

13. Cry It Out Method

The CIO method was used on me and my sister, and I remember listening to my sister cry for what felt like hours and just wanting to go into her room and make her feel better.   I personally will not use this method, because I just can’t stand hearing my baby cry like that. I hear it works wonderfully for some families though.

Eleanor

This pretty much sums up my daughter, happy with a little bit of odd.

A Proper Introduction

My name is Kyla, I am 18 years old and began life in a little town in Ontario.  To hear my childhood counsellor say it, my life has been a hot mess.
My parents are divorced, on my dad’s side I have a half brother, on my mom’s I have two half sisters, and two step sisters. We have moved around a lot, and I attended many different elementary schools, and two different high schools.  I have always been the “difficult child” of my family ranging from two year old tantrums where I would destroy other peoples belongings,  the pre-teen drama, the high school self harming and drug experimenting days, to the most recent and best, teen mother.

I found out I was pregnant in August 2011,  I had just dumped my boyfriend because, frankly, he was an ass with some major trust issues.  Spencer, the ex-boyfriend, already had a one year old son at this time.  I informed him of the pregnancy, and that we would not be getting back together because of it.  He said he’d be there for the baby.
November 2011 I found out I was having a girl and on March 20, 2012 Eleanor Elizabeth was born.  I was induced at 37 weeks because of cholestasis, so she was a bit on the small side, weighing in at 5lbs 11oz.

Ellie, or bug as we call her most often, is now 13 months old and is still small, 19lbs 7oz and only 27 inches tall!  Spencer has seen her only once, when she was roughly 4 months old.  Currently, we are waiting on a DNA test (because apparently the fact that she looks just like him, and I only slept with him means nothing to him) so we can continue on with figuring out child support and visitations.

Anthony, ohh, Anthony.  My best friend from high school, who became my boyfriend when Ellie was 4 months old.  He has been acting as the father figure, and she calls him daddy.  This guy is honestly amazing, and I am so lucky to have him in my life.  Seriously, the only complaint I can ever come up with about him is that he works a lot.   He is wonderful with Eleanor, and we have a bright future planned out for us.

Currently, I am living with my mother, and youngest sister barely scraping by while we wait for things to settle down after the most recent split up between her and my now ex-step dad.  I would like to go to college, and eventually become a Child and Youth Worker.   For now, I am content with being a stay at home mom to my wonderful little girl.

I wanted to start this blog so I had somewhere I could start really documenting things that happen in mine and Ellie’s life.  Everything from daily smiles, big milestones and pictures.   I’m fairly new to blogging, so I hope I can really stick to this.